Take the Relationship Quiz
Donate

Calm Down!

meditation Jul 16, 2023
beach with early morning sunrise

Has someone ever told you to calm down? Doesn't seem to work, does it?

For years our therapist recommended meditation, to center, take time out of the day...7 times a day?! Spending time in prayer was difficult enough much less stopping on purpose 7 times a day. So as I reported back to him about my unsuccessful attempts he recommended aligning it when I would drink water or use the bathroom.

It wasn't until the summer of 2016 when I lost my Mom and a couple of additional traumatic events that I was desperate for some peace. I knew I couldn't meditate on my own so I pulled up an app I had on my phone from a couple of years ago called Calm. Obviously, there are plenty of meditation options but this app has been my favorite.

It is a fantastic app with calming scenes, visually and audibly. See below for all the different scenes you can set your calming meditation on. Mountain Lake happens to be my favorite with the bubbling brook and birds singing in the background. 

It will take some discipline to get started but start small. The app provides timed meditations, which will walk you through a 3-minute session all the way up to a 30-minute session. The female voiceover has just the right tone and tempo. I started off with the 'guided' meditation by doing the 'body scan.'

I lean towards being an anxious person so I was hopeful the body scan session would calm me down. The body scan session walks you through from head to toe, at least the 25-minute one does. I haven't done the other time sets. To my surprise when she walks you through the stomach area, the place where I hold my anxiety, she asks you to notice how you feel in that area. Once you pay attention to the feeling she suggests for you to accept the feeling. The last thing I wanted to do was accept how anxious how I felt. It was counter-intuitive to "accept" those anxious feelings. But when I did, I started to calm down. Strange how that works.

This is what began my love affair with meditation. The other bonus surprise was after a 25-minute session I was more open to spending time praying, reading the Bible, or listening to inspirational music.

Another welcomed unexpected feature happened later in the day. I would be able to regulate how I felt by 'tapping into' the calm feeling I had during meditation. This part is hard to describe but if I had practiced meditating that morning it was almost like a reservoir I could tap into again at will.

I can read over this blog and think this all sounds so new age but I promise you it sounds 'out there' until you try it. Now I haven't tried to stop 7 times a day but having just one time a day has been very soothing to my soul. It certainly helps me be a more patient kinder wife and I'm guessing Russ appreciates the times I meditate just like he appreciates the times I've been to Crossfit...but that's another blog. <wink>

I would love to hear back if you do this already or if you've tried it for the first time. What has surprised you in doing this practice? Reply back to me via the newsletter.

 

Learn new communication skills you can immediately apply in your marriage and some harder skills (with practice) that will transform your marriage.

TAKE A SNEAK PEEK